This series all feels related, something new in me grows, or perhaps something old that I had forgotten?
A beautiful silky beard
I am looking in the mirror and have a beard. It is not too long, silky and black, I enjoy stroking it. I know that its always been there, but it was blond before so no one could see it. But now the hair has gone black everyone will see it. I worry for a while "people won't like it, this won't be popular".
However I feel such love and pleasure stroking my beard that I conclude I just don't care, people will just have to put up with it.
(its looks a bit like this one https://menshairandbeards.com/maintain-a-short-beard/)
He loves me ...
I am sitting with an old boyfriend, he looks like he did when we first met, lovely long curly Italian hair. His skin is more tanned than usual and he looks beautiful. He is trying to tell me something, I listen closely, intently, and he says ...
"I love you so much, that I am afraid, if I tell you, the ground will fall from beneath my feet."
Later I see him with a blond haired woman on his lap, he is stroking her - and she dominates him - I am sad and can't understand how I lost him.
He loves me 2 ...
I am on a bus, distracted by a myriad things, looking around my attention unable to settle anywhere. I feel someone sit beside me, it is my old family constellations therapist whom I saw over a couple of years and had a bit (not too much) of a crush on.
He sits beside me, my attention settles, I unify - he smiles at me and I feel loved.
I am a soldier
I am in a white navy uniform (USA?). I walk into a school with alot of other military men. I have an extinction rebellion logo on my shoulder, printed onto a scrap of fabric.
Suddenly I am outside of me, and now in a young womans body. She is with an older woman who mocks my wearing of the logo.
The younger woman says "for him, this is huge, its a huge step to wear this. Leave him alone."
Trans man pan
I am with a trans man - he is like pan - I am with him and I am him. We play, he has a huge penis, its very exciting.
Next I am just him and working out on a weight lifting machine. I face forward in it (the wrong way round!) till I work out how to use it and face outwards. I squat down, then up, down, then up lifting the weights. Each squat feels powerful and effortless, I am very aware of my spine and thighs.
However I catch sight of myself in a window and my legs are a bit wonky (almost like bambi) as actually is the case in waking life - I have ankles that roll in so everything upwards from that is a bit crooked.
I wake up aroused for the first time in a while - and all day my legs feel really powerful and I am very aware of my energy connection with the earth.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pan_(god)
A beautiful silky beard
I am looking in the mirror and have a beard. It is not too long, silky and black, I enjoy stroking it. I know that its always been there, but it was blond before so no one could see it. But now the hair has gone black everyone will see it. I worry for a while "people won't like it, this won't be popular".
However I feel such love and pleasure stroking my beard that I conclude I just don't care, people will just have to put up with it.
(its looks a bit like this one https://menshairandbeards.com/maintain-a-short-beard/)
He loves me ...
I am sitting with an old boyfriend, he looks like he did when we first met, lovely long curly Italian hair. His skin is more tanned than usual and he looks beautiful. He is trying to tell me something, I listen closely, intently, and he says ...
"I love you so much, that I am afraid, if I tell you, the ground will fall from beneath my feet."
Later I see him with a blond haired woman on his lap, he is stroking her - and she dominates him - I am sad and can't understand how I lost him.
He loves me 2 ...
I am on a bus, distracted by a myriad things, looking around my attention unable to settle anywhere. I feel someone sit beside me, it is my old family constellations therapist whom I saw over a couple of years and had a bit (not too much) of a crush on.
He sits beside me, my attention settles, I unify - he smiles at me and I feel loved.
I am a soldier
I am in a white navy uniform (USA?). I walk into a school with alot of other military men. I have an extinction rebellion logo on my shoulder, printed onto a scrap of fabric.
Suddenly I am outside of me, and now in a young womans body. She is with an older woman who mocks my wearing of the logo.
The younger woman says "for him, this is huge, its a huge step to wear this. Leave him alone."
Trans man pan
I am with a trans man - he is like pan - I am with him and I am him. We play, he has a huge penis, its very exciting.
Next I am just him and working out on a weight lifting machine. I face forward in it (the wrong way round!) till I work out how to use it and face outwards. I squat down, then up, down, then up lifting the weights. Each squat feels powerful and effortless, I am very aware of my spine and thighs.
However I catch sight of myself in a window and my legs are a bit wonky (almost like bambi) as actually is the case in waking life - I have ankles that roll in so everything upwards from that is a bit crooked.
I wake up aroused for the first time in a while - and all day my legs feel really powerful and I am very aware of my energy connection with the earth.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pan_(god)
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